We often leave it up to the courts to decide on what to do with men who have children they don’t or can’t financially support, but fathers who intentionally dodge their financial obligations to their children may have other problems they suffer from related to inadequacies from their own life experience of growing up in a fatherless household.
The lessons young men learn about fatherhood begins at home. However, fatherless young men who never learn what is expected of them when they eventually have a family of their own. These men often detach themselves from the experience of raising children out of fear of reliving past feelings of abandonment and neglect that they themselves may have experienced as a child.
It’s challenging in many ways for some men to accept their responsibility of being a father, especially when you’re told growing up that you will never amount to anything, or that you’re just like your dad–which can have a negative connotation.
"Moreover, if the solution is to lock up every father who falls behind, or fails to pay their child support, many young men will never learn how to be a good dad. It’s children that hurt the most when fathers are absent from their lives. Courts and policymakers must understand and consider all of the challenges children of incarcerated parents face when making decisions that affects the lives of millions of children."
Clearly, there is a disconnect that must be addressed, but incarcerating men because they have failed at being good providers to their children is not the solution. Despite the challenges, let’s hope that all men can find the experience of becoming a father a blessing, and learn how to become a good father and provider by spending less time in jail, and more time with their kids.
